


Insomnia

by fangirl_from_the_bookstore



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Angst, Insomnia, Mental Health Issues, Sleep, Sleep Disorder, Sleep Disturbance, idk that's basically it, insomnia is a bitch, trapped in your mind
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:20:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22230085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fangirl_from_the_bookstore/pseuds/fangirl_from_the_bookstore
Summary: He tried again distracting himself by thinking about anything else like the plot of a movie or a book or how to cook spaghetti. But it was no use. He just wouldn't fall asleep.
Kudos: 7





	Insomnia

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: Now this is how I deal with sleep insomnia, idk if it is common to react like this but that is basically what is happenig to me

There were voices. So many voices. They made his head spin and his body tingle. It weren't voices he could understand, it were just fragments of sentences. Gibberish. Nonsense. There was no chance of focusing on one word long enough to understand what it meant, because then another word would just be louder.

Stiles tossed and turned in his bed. But nothing felt right. His body was restless and his thoughts were jumping around his head. He was starting to sweat and kicked away the blanket, but it got tangled up on his foot and he nearly screamed out in frustration when he tore it free. But merely one minute after his body turned ice cold and he had to grab the blanket again. It was just a never ending story of getting hot and then cold and then hot again. 

He wanted to open his eyes, so that he could get out of this head space of being trapped in his own mind, but they were so tired that they started to water and hurt as soon as he tried. So he clenched them shut again, but still sleep wouldn't come.

Stiles started talking to him in his own mind. _It's okay Stiles, just sleep. There is nothing you can do right now, besides sleep. Just calm down. Deep breaths. And sleep. Calm. Down. Sleeeeep._

He tried of thinking about something nice, something calm. For a moment, images of his friends were replacing the flashy colours in his mind, but not for long. It was like a fight before his eyes. Lightnings shot behind his lids and tore through the images of his loved ones. His eyes were restlessly moving behind his closed lids. The constant rush of blood in his ears didn't help either. Stiles was unable to distract himself because his body was just so _tired_ but his mind wouldn't stop spinning.

And then he noticed tears rolling down his face. When did he start to cry? _Why_ did he even cry? He didn't even know. Maybe it was the exhaustion. Maybe it was the constant repressed fear that now came rising to the top. Or maybe it was just the frustration of not being in control. Stiles couldn't be bothered to care.

In the distance he heard his father's car pull up in his driveway, notifying him that it was way too late at night for him to still be awake. The front door opened with a soft squeak and then closed again. A few seconds later Stiles heard his father's footsteps approaching his room and tried to calm his racing heart down. Stiles saw the light moving under his door and held his breath. Noah was standing at the door, listening. For a moment both of them focused on the other, but then Noah walked away and Stiles' breath escaped in a little sob. He hid his face in his pillow, afraid that his dad had heard it. He didn't want to see anyone right now.

It was all just too much. He felt restless and dead tired at the same time. There were TOO MANY GODDAMN VOICES in his head but he couldn't shut them out. An angry grunt escaped his lips and was muffled by the pillow because he was so exhausted he just wanted to sleep! But he couldn't.

His mind started playing games with him. Started showing him things, about death and the future. About things that could happen and things that did happen. His thoughts were jumping around in his head so badly that a headache started to form. He tried again distracting himself by thinking about _anything_ else like the plot of a movie or a book or how to cook spaghetti. But it was no use. He just wouldn't fall asleep.

Stiles took in a deep shuddering breath and forced his eyes to open, even though his body screamed at him not to. After a while though the whole room appeared brighter and his mind was now fully alert, ready to start the day. At 1:57 in the morning.

He knew he had to sleep, to give his body and mind a chance to heal and to rest, but for some reason....he couldn't. The thoughts in his head were going crazy. Jumping around from one side to another, flashy images continued playing in his mind and his eyes roamed restlessly around the room in jerky motions. He became so restless that he abruptly sat upright and took his phone. He ignored the stars in his vision and turned it on. A wave of dizziness rolled over him and made his stomach turn.

The light nearly blinded him and his right eyelid started to twitch, but he didn't care. Stiles opened the browser on his phone with an exhausted sigh and started googling random stuff. How to built your own light bulb. Can someone die from eating too much salt? What is the weather in California right now? Can dogs understand us? How to be safe when an earthquake hits.

He kept going. Article after article. Video after video. He just had to keep going until he could start the day and distract himself with other stuff. His eyes and his body were _screaming_ at him to just lay down and let them rest. But his mind angrily urged him to keep going. And so Stiles did. Because he knew that as soon as he would stop, he wouldn't find relief. He would just be trapped in his mind again and met with other scenarios that would make his body tingle in anxiety and fear. His mind would continue playing tricks on him. Lead him to a place he didn't want to go. But it was out of his power.

And he had no chance of escaping it.


End file.
